i have a client. he is a nice fellow. he calls me "little mama". sometimes shortened to just plain "mama".
it is just what he does. i think all chicks, to him, get this title. he doesn't mean any disrespect. and he often catches himself and says "... i mean, miss rocket".
the problem is that no matter how hip i try to be, i am still just a dork deep down inside. because when i call him and he says "hey mama," i say "oh no, this isn't your mother, this is miss wolverine."
and then he always says "i know who this is, miss rocket, how are you?"
and somewhere during this exchange i think - shit i've done it again. i KNOW that he probably calls every woman he knows "mama". and i KNOW that it's just slang for "hey chick that i count amongst my friends". but tell that to the big nerd that lives inside me. she wants to clarify that his mother is not, indeed, calling him at this juncture.
and the big dork wins every time.
so then i try to outsmart the big dork and when my client answers the phone, i say "hi! it's miss wolverine." To which he replies, "hey mama!" and then the big dork takes over and i STILL say "oh no, its not your mother..."
and then i stop bc i realize that i've done it again. and we just laugh at what a big dork i am.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Friday, July 8, 2011
i drove to licking today
and here is a list of all the dead things i saw in the road: (mind you, i am only counting the 35 miles of Hwy 63 between Rolla and Licking)
- 7 animals of undetermined origin
- 3 raccoons
- 2 armadillos
- 2 skunks
- 1 giant hawk that was feeding on a dead skunk when it, too, was hit by a car
- 1 more skunk who was hit by a car, then eaten by a hawk, then hit by a car again (see above)
- 4 things that might have been snakes or parts of tires
- 1 coyote
- 1 jaunty man with beret and knapsack hiking down the highway toward oblivion
- 3 barefoot amish toddlers running around and giggling in a quicky mart
- (infinity) crabby people who also do not know how to drive
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